Home Addiction Setting Clear Boundaries: Why It’s Important and How To Do It – Cathy Taughinbaugh

Setting Clear Boundaries: Why It’s Important and How To Do It – Cathy Taughinbaugh

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Setting clear boundaries can be a problem for parents.

As a parent, it’s natural to want to support your teenage or adult child who is going through a difficult time.

Still, establishing clear boundaries can be helpful for parents of teens and young adults struggling with substance use. Please consider

Below are some things you can do to help.

  1. Listen non-judgmentally and offer emotional support.
  2. Encourage them to seek professional help, such as therapy or counseling.
  3. Help develop an action plan to address the challenges.
  4. Provides practical support, such as finding resources.
  5. Please be patient and understanding while they go through the difficulties.
  6. Set clear boundaries where necessary.

We’ll take a closer look at #6 today and set clear boundaries.

Your role as a parent is to provide guidance and support, but it is up to your child to take action and make positive changes in their lives.

Setting clear boundaries is essential to all healthy relationships and is a valuable life skill that you and your child can practice and master together. Boundaries help establish expectations and limitations. , make sure everyone involved feels respected and safe. Here’s why setting clear boundaries and learning how to do them effectively is so important.

Why setting boundaries is important

Setting boundaries is important for maintaining a healthy relationship because it helps avoid misunderstandings and conflicts. Without these clearly established limits and boundaries, your child may assume that you allow them to behave in ways that make you feel uncomfortable or disrespectful. Setting limits establishes a framework for respectful communication and behavior.

Confronting a child’s drug use can be difficult for any parent. Even parents who otherwise have solid boundaries can find their kids pushing buttons right away. Adjustments may be required to meet new challenges surrounding the child’s behavior, and families may require additional help and support.

Boundaries also help you prioritize your own needs and well-being. If you know your limits, you can communicate them to your children and other family members so they don’t feel overwhelmed or compromise your values. Building strong boundaries is a skill that must be learned and practiced. Helping your child acquire this important life skill at an early age can help reduce stress and promote the overall health of you and your family during difficult and overwhelming times. , in order to keep peace in the family, parents may feel that their values ​​are out the window.

With healthy boundaries, you can communicate your values ​​clearly and effectively to your son or daughter. When parents are trying to cope with substance use, they often find out of fear that they have not established strong boundaries with their children. This may not have been an issue in the past. But now, with the new challenges of substance use and children striving to challenge their own limits, understanding the issues and establishing clear boundaries should be a priority.

What is a boundary

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Boundaries are how we protect ourselves in all aspects of life. Dealing with children who push established boundaries is often not a problem unless problems such as substance use arise. As a parent, set guidelines, rules, or restrictions. Growing up in your home, they learn to adhere to your values. Boundaries also include consequences when children do not adhere to restrictions. Boundaries are like fences around you and other family members you want to protect, not brick walls.

Brick walls keep people out. When setting boundaries, you want to keep a positive relationship with your child, but you can’t do that when you’re on the other side of a brick wall. But when you’re on the other side of the fence, you can maintain a relationship with someone. It can also help to set the same boundaries for all children in the family. That way, you can ensure that children who struggle with substance use are not marginalized or singled out.

Boundaries are generally rigid or may be non-existent. When it comes to intrafamily boundaries, there are four parenting styles, and most parents may fit her one type somewhere along the continuum, or they may be a mix.

  1. Dominant: Dominant parents require that children obey marching orders issued by the mother or father. Parents are strict and prioritize conformity and compliance.
  2. Tolerant: Tolerant parents score poorly when it comes to demanding accountability from their teens or young adults. It often saves children from experiencing natural consequences.
  3. Not Involved: Parents who are not involved rank as less demanding and less responsive to their children. They are emotionally and/or physically unavailable to teens or young adults.
  4. Authoritative: Authoritative parents are fair but firm. They set realistic limits and insist that children adhere to them. They are warm, affectionate and respectful.

Identifying your own parenting style can be difficult, especially when your family is in crisis or dealing with difficult issues. Asking for help and getting an outside perspective on the situation can be very helpful. A trusted friend, family member, or professional can help identify strengths and weaknesses in your parenting style and identify areas for improvement.

You may find yourself prone to changing or adjusting your parenting methods based on challenges and circumstances, but most of the time there is a basic style you can rely on.


The following steps can help you set clear boundaries in your relationship with a struggling child.

1. Identify your limits.

Consider what actions, behaviors, or situations make you feel uncomfortable or disrespectful. The first thing to start when choosing to set boundaries with a teen or young adult is to consider what behavior is unacceptable. Take the time to write down what patterns you see and what goes against your value system. Your child may be rude to you, neglect your schedule, or be emotionally or physically abusive. Sometimes behavior falls into a gray area. Observe your child’s behavior and decide what is acceptable and what is not. It is also helpful to discuss concerns with your child. You can invite them to brainstorm boundaries and outcomes they can agree on.

2. Communicate your needs.

Let your child know what they need to do to feel comfortable and respected. Use “I” statements to avoid sounding accusatory or confrontational. Determine the essential boundaries of the situation. Communicate your thoughts early on so your child is clear about your limits. Children are most likely to help when boundaries are clear, consistent, and lovingly communicated upfront. to force

The best time to do this is when you are calm and not overzealous. Communicate to your child behaviors that you do not tolerate.

3. Be consistent

Stick to your boundaries and follow them consistently.

Consistency helps establish trust and respect in a relationship. One of the pitfalls parents face is her inability to follow through. When setting limits, only impose limits that you think can be enforced. Setting no boundaries at all is better than setting and not enforcing boundaries. You will lose your child’s respect and he will be motivated to see what other boundaries he can push. please.

We want to be role models for children. It’s frustrating for you when your child goes back to their language. Be their role model and show them that you mean what you say.

4. Practice self-care.

Make time for self-care, prioritize your needs, and take care of yourself. Helps maintain a healthy balance in relationships.

It’s not easy to set and establish new boundaries, let alone maintain healthy boundaries, when you’re overwhelmed and exhausted. The more often you can add activities to your life that help you stay focused, the better. Another important way to prioritize self-care is to seek help from a therapist or support group to help her through the challenges of parenting her teen or young adult struggling with substance use.

In conclusion, setting clear boundaries is an essential part of a healthy relationship. By establishing expectations and limits, you can foster mutual respect, reduce conflict, and prioritize well-being.

Remember to communicate your needs, be consistent, and practice self-care in order to maintain healthy boundaries in your relationship with your child with love and care.

Access research-based resources Helps support children in kind and caring ways that lead to change.

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